It always starts out the same way. I start feeling anxious, uncomfortable, discontent – any negative emotion you can think of. I usually try to fix it by getting a new hobby or fixing my attention on something to numb the ache. All that this manages to accomplish is to further frustrate me and make me realize how much I need life. LIFE.
When I sit down and start writing the words that I feel, I always come to the same conclusion. Time with You. This is what my soul longs for. This is why I experience frustration and anxiety and fear and loneliness. I long for you as a deer pants for water. My soul needs to reach out to You and be touched by Your life-giving Spirit.
“AS THE hart pants and longs for the water brooks, so I pant and long for You, O God. My inner self thirsts for God, for the living God. When shall I come and behold the face of God?” Ps 42:1-2
You are life-giving and real. You don’t exist far away, You are close to me this very second. You are intimately acquainted with my life and You know my thoughts afar off. I will never find delight in anything other than You. You are the essence of joy – you are the perfect solution to my heart’s cry. You bring peace and you wrap me in the softness of your love. I feel at peace in You. I find myself in You. The anxious thoughts in me goes quiet at the sight of your beauty. Your presence is the only encounter I need.
I love you with all my heart. Thank you for saving me and choosing to be with me, mistakes and all. You are wonderful and good.
Time to tune in to 5 Minute Friday, with The Gypsy Mama. Every Friday readers write for 5 minutes about a chosen topic, but they are not allowed to edit their work, back track or over think it. Today’s topic is Path, so here are my 5 unedited minutes:
Our journey is scattered with so many incredible memories. From discovering You at the age of 10 to only starting to comprehend your love for me at the (almost) age of 30. You have touched my heart more times than I can recall, and each time overwhelmed me with the sweetness of your Spirit.
Our path is filled with memories of your faithfulness. You have always been the only constant in our walk. I have faltered so many times, yet I can only marvel at how patient you are with me…how much you love me. No words can express how deeply you are ingrained into my soul, how I can never be separated from you. It fills me with the deepest sense of peace and contentment. Nothing else matters except You. Your presence satisfies me.
“Nevertheless I am continually with You; You do hold my right hand.” Psalm 73:23
Growing up, not many children are encouraged to ‘just be themselves’. Most of the time they receive the message that it is better to blend in – to rather not swim upstream and cause commotion. This message takes root and grows stronger as they mature into adulthood – and many times the effect is that they live a life not entirely true to themselves.
The past week I have thought about this message a lot. God did not create us to conform, or to have all Christians act towards him in the exact same way. Yet, in most churches today all believers sing the same songs and say the right things at the right time. I believe God delights in authenticity. I believe a genuine heart pleases Him more than conformity. I believe we need to express ourselves in the way that feels most natural to us – no matter how the world perceives it. Worship can take on many forms – whether you experience God and delight in Him (which is worship) through painting, singing, writing, sports or admin.
I just believe we need to live before God from the depths of our souls and be honest with Him no matter what. If you are experiencing an off day where you need to vent – tell Him about it. If something doesn’t make sense and you are angry with Him, tell Him this! Remember – God knows your thoughts afar off (Ps 139:2), so you can’t surprise Him and shock Him away by what you say!
“God is a Spirit (a spiritual Being) and those who worship Him must worship Him in spirit and in truth (reality).” John 4:24
What do you want to say to God today? Live in His presence as the only version of yourself on the planet. Don’t conform to someone else’s standards – you will rob the world of your much needed uniqueness.
“Behold, You desire truth in the inner being…” Ps 51:6
God invites you to fill your whole being with His presence. His presence is more satisfying than the richest delicacies or drinks available to man. His presence will bring peace to your tormented heart. It will quieten your racing mind. It will envelop you when you feel lonely. It is priceless, and freely available to all who need it, or long for it.
I desperately need it today. Which is why I was filled with such thankfulness and relief when I read the following scripture:
“Wait and listen, everyone who is thirsty! Come to the waters; and he who has no money, come, buy and eat! Yes, come, buy [priceless, spiritual] wine and milk without money and without price [simply for the self-surrender that accepts the blessing]. Why do you spend your money for that which is not bread, and your earnings for what does not satisfy? Hearken diligently to Me, and eat what is good, and let your soul delight itself in fatness [the profuseness of spiritual joy]. Incline your ear [submit and consent to the divine will] and come to Me; hear, and your soul will revive; and I will make an everlasting covenant or league with you, even the sure mercy (kindness, goodwill, and compassion) promised to David.” Is 55:1-3
Every part of this scripture blessed me. Am I thirsty? Yes! Do I need spiritual nourishment? Yes! Do I need FREE spiritual nourishment? Yes!
I will eat the nourishing, soul-satisfying promises of God. I will receive life from it so that my soul will be revived! I will be delighted in the fatness (total spiritual joy) that will overtake me after such a spiritual meal, and I will come to Him and be showered by his kindness, goodwill and compassion.
“Man shall not live and be upheld and sustained by bread alone, but by every word that comes forth from the mouth of God.” Matthew 4:4
I sometimes look at the content of my blog and wonder if there is enough variety to keep readers interested. This comes from a human mindset that always wants to hear new things and constantly be entertained. In itself it is not a bad mindset to have – but in terms of Christianity it can lead to many churches straying away from the core focus which is Jesus. He is, and should always be, the center of the Gospel.
Paul also wrote about the same topic in Phillipians 3:
“For the rest, my brethren, delight yourselves in the Lord and continue to rejoice that you are in Him. To keep writing to you [over and over] of the same things is not irksome to me, and it is [a precaution] for your safety.” Phillipians 3:1
By repeating the truth over and over again, Paul wanted to protect their newfound safety in Christ. They were surrounded by lawful voices telling them to do various things in order to establish righteousness. He repeated over and over again that Jesus is the only source of their righteousness, and the only way to salvation.
Just like Paul, I will repeat these truths in order to protect my own spiritual safety and that of all the readers.
Stay safe in the singular focus of the Gospel which is Jesus. Stay safe in the knowledge that faith in Him is the only way to attain righteousness. Stay safe in the knowledge that none of your own works can save you. Stay safe in the knowledge that God does not condemn you, and that He loves you without condition.
Time to tune in to 5 Minute Friday, with The Gypsy Mama. Every Friday readers write for 5 minutes about a chosen topic, but they are not allowed to edit their work, back track or over think it. Today’s topic is Opportunity, so here is my 5 unedited minutes:
God was the first to take the opportunity to reach out. He looked at my lost soul and decided that I was worth the life of His only, perfectly blameless Son. He made it possible for me to reach into the depths of the holy of holies – to literally step in and know Him intimately. He gave me the opportunity to live with Him for all eternity, and all I had to do was to believe in His Son’s sacrifice.
I grabbed hold of this opportunity given to me with both hands. It is completely undeserved – receiving complete pardon of my sinful nature by only believing! What an incredible exchange!
Now I will endeavour to see God’s goodness in everything. It is all around me – I can literally taste and see that the Lord is good (Ps 34:8)! I will take every opportunity to think upon His goodness and provision, and be filled with His life and peace.
All that remains is the opportunity to love Him, because He first loved me. There is no effort in our relationship, just grace.
Time to tune in to 5 Minute Friday, with The Gypsy Mama. Every Friday readers write for 5 minutes about a chosen topic, but they are not allowed to edit their work, back track or over think it. Today’s topic is Perspective, so here is my 5 unedited minutes:
His vantage point is different from mine. When I look at me I see brokenness, fragility and sin. I see everything that should keep me away from His presence, and all that should exclude me from His grace.
What He sees is a completely different picture. When He looks in my direction, He sees a body that has been made whole by His Son’s death. He sees a strong woman, holy and unblemished. Instead of the faults that cloud my vision, He looks into the face of Jesus – and all He can see is my righteousness. No effort is required from my side other than to believe in His sacrifice. This washes me once, forever and perfectly.